Tinsley is the man!

Dear Mr. Tinsley, please DON'T resign.  We, the opposition (if there does exist such a thing), hope you stay firmly planted in your public position where you will serve as a constant reminder to us that we, the voters of Brookfield, were taken for a serious ride by everyone involved in Mr. Tinsley's campaign.  Yes, you fooled us and we fell for it hook line and sinker.  But Caveat Emptor would be the correct words here, we have ourselves someone in the lead seat who has demonstrated on more than one occasion that he cannot be trusted to make competent decisions regarding financial ventures that he happens to be involved in.  Fortunately there exists in our town such an information vacuum that we never dug up this publicly available information until hours after he handily won the election by an overwhelming mandate of slightly more than 60 votes.
Now, it is certainly likely that Mr. Tinsley will turn his image around, perhaps he could find a PR firm to help with that (I hear Mitt Romney has some extra time on his hands these days and he certainly has binders full of good ideas that may assist Mr. Tinsley), and in two short years he could theoretically become the hero of our small town.  Perhaps.  Though if that does indeed happen, I would suggest putting a couple bucks on the Cubs for the pennant.
But, luckily for us, even if Mr. Tinsley does decide to abdicate his position in favor of a more lucrative venture, we will have Mr. Beck to remind us of even more horrid things.  Of course, we mustn't make light of Mr. Beck, certainly not with the knowledge that several (26 to be exact) of his friends own at least one firearm and, due to the newly elected board members generosity in this holiday season, are likely to be well stocked with ammunition.  This could make board meetings much more interesting, as well as drive up sales of Kevlar based outerwear for anyone who regularly is able to attend those meetings.
We should all "move on" and let these fine gentlemen serve out their elected positions, and turn our attention to the much more serious matters at hand such as our former first selectman's penchant for involving himself in pranks that would get the better part of us grounded and our car taken away (or at least sent to bed without dinner).  Perhaps taking his car away would be a good idea, because if we don't nip this in the bud soon, this "gateway" act of stealing election signs (which artfully decorate our landscape every so often) could lead to other horrors, such as peppering his ex-girlfriends home with reams of toilet paper, or even worse, whipping down Candlewood Lake road late at night in a rousing game of mailbox baseball.  God forbid such a pestilence would come to our town.
Now I should remind some of our readers that a better part of this is tongue in cheek, and not completely in the realm or seriousness.  I think it's time for a nice quality beer....Mr. Tinsley could probably suggest a good ale don't you think?