Party Fundamentals

If you're throwing a party it means there's something worth celebrating going on.

But, alas, we often allow ourselves to get so overwhelmed in the lead up to said party, that by the time it rolls around we sometimes look (or at least feel) like this:

Whether you're planning a Bar Mitzvah, throwing a graduation party, or just want to host an intimate dinner party, there are common denominators. We'll start with some of those today, and broaden our horizons over the course of the next few weeks (think tips, DIY tutorials, and everything event-related).

Welcome to lili's corner!

To ensure we keep the fun in fundamentals, here are a few things to consider when planning a party.

That wannabe four-letter word: BUDGET.

Figure out how much money you have to spend before you even think about inviting people — and then stick to that. Paring down a guest list can be traumatic. Not to mention that giving up something you've set your heart on can put a damper on your mood.

The heart of the matter

Your guest list needs to be compiled with care — no matter what kind of an event you're planning. You want people to have a good time, not stand around feeling awkward or out of place. The key to that is a combination of variety and common interests if you're inviting people who are strangers to one another, and an understanding of the relationship dynamics between people who already know one another. In other words, minimize the potential for drama.

Location, location, location

Apart from being venue-appropriate for the kind of party you're having, make sure all of your guests know where they are coming. Trust me when I say that spending time on the phone helping frustrated people navigate the neighborhood is not how you want to spend your time. Been there, done that, not fun. Directions, a basic map with the invitation, or a nod in the general direction of mapquest will take care of that.

Don't get hung up on your game plan.

People you were counting on to be the life and soul of the party don't show up, or don't behave the way you think they will. The weather doesn't cooperate. Case in point: my son's eighth birthday party. An outer space theme planned around a telescope he'd received for Christmas. April 1st rolled around. It snowed. So much for that! Here's the secret. Don't overplan, and have Plan B sitting quietly on the back burner. Perfection is a matter of perception. Most people will never know that you had something planned which didn't take off — so don't let your demeanor give it away. Guests get uncomfortable when the host is upset and there's nothing they can do.

You're hosting the party.

If you are running the kitchen, making sure everyone has a drink, trying to engage shy guests, and ensuring that any young 'uns are not using your pool cover as a trampoline (despite the presence of their parents), chances are you aren't enjoying your own party. And, worse still, your body language will give you away. Don't be afraid to delegate. Every circle of friends has individuals who are more than happy to help out. Reach out to those friends in advance and give them small tasks suited to their temperament. People who come to your party want to spend time with you — not remember you as a blur.

I'll stop here for today — but the floor is open for stories, comments, and any questions you may have.

Thanks for stopping by!